dirt 'stache artistry

serena, you just got served. finally.

i'm prepared to take some heat for this -- i fast forwarded through the majority of serena scenes this week. once they started quick cutting through that photo-shoot montage, i blacked out and drifted off to memories of the fourth season opener of the o.c. when ryan gets shot and fox thought a slow, blue-hued, over-shot scene would do the trick to get the melancholic vibe across. it just made me want him to die. (whoops!) i'm sure there was an imogen heap song playing in the background. buick!

anyway, thats the come the fuck on!! vibe i've been getting from the last couple of episodes of ggirl. from the fashion show to jenny's mullet, to rufus's VAPID personality (thank god for his washed-up 90's rocker shirts, or i'd write him off completely. he's still decent on mute for another episode or two).

i love blake in general, but can she PLEASE be a bitch again. that half episode when she mean girls-style queen bee'd the UES? not enough!!

perfect segue into mr. hall's apperance as eleanor waldorf's new man. there is nowayinmotherfuckinghell that would happen, and i don't mean that would never happen in real life -- this film major is just fine with suspension of disbelief -- i mean that would never happen in the waldorfs' life. never. and then the tie in to aaron?? at least hold back for a full episode before you reveal something like that. and what 20-something son tells his dad the full name of the chick he's been on one date with and goes into explicit detail about their date??

if this were ny mag, i'd be at -500 points for this episode. not entirely fair. it's sort of like if you have two kids - one's a straight A-student, class president, varisity soccer player and one's, well, a complete failure (Ed. note - i was the complete failure). you don't care at all if the failure comes home with a C on his chem test. the better kid, though, you'd go ballistic. gossip girl is the better kid. i know there's potential there, hidden under jenny's cheap eye liner. step it up. let jenny stop being a little bitch and come home for real. there's no way a spoiled 15 year old would live on the street just to spite her dad. let dan sell out and let bart/chuck completely fuck him out of everything he has (which, is what? pretty much just his pride...?). he's a complete punk, he could get smacked around a little bit.

but, back to serena. i have to admit the writers caught me in a lie. all through last episode and a good 20 minutes of this one, i kept screaming "serena would NOT be into this guy. he's SO gross." but serena would ABSOLUTELY be into this guy. and, i have to admit it was when genius blair hit me over the head with 'you think you're a free spirit' line shot at S. and she does. she would date aaron to prove she is an artist. when she's not at all. you can have her dance around in her slip in the middle of central park in november (it's 31 degrees out today, btw), but you can't convince me she actually listens to joni mitchell. she just leaves her "dog eat dog" LP lying around her bedroom for people to think she does.

so yes, i'm pretty fired up with disappointment that i've devoted time to this show and i've simply been let down. and it doesn't take much to figure out where all of this angst stems from -- MORE CHUCK AND BLAIR, PLEASE!!!!