unoriginal, unintelligent thoughts.

everyone at work is hungover today. i'm not, but it's the general vibe, so i'm happy to go along with it. because i'm clearly not doing work, i've been thinking a lot about the world around me. changes, staticism (the act of being static -- an invented oxymoron -- kind of like normalcy. if warren g. harding can invent a word, i can.), ticks of the world (not to be confused w/ ticks of the woman next to me on the 1 train this morning).

so i have a few things for you to ponder along with me -- they mostly revolve around being as lazy as possible.

1) Is there a systematic way to pack for a move? It seems to me there should be an easier way than throwing everything you own into boxes/bags then into a truck then out of the boxes/bags into their new spot. why aren't there more services out there (especially in nyc) with people who will do it for you? that would be a pretty sick job to have. spend a day, throw someone's shit in a box and get a few bills. you don't have to do any of the actual heavy lifting. just the packing. i'm pretty persuasive huh? you're totally convinced. come on over to my place around 9am tomorrow and i'll let you know if you have what it takes to be a professional packer. now, i dont have any cash, exactly, but there's a good chance i have a half-corked bottle of cabernet on my nightstand...

2) Why have toilets not really evolved in the last 859289436 years? i'm not getting graphic here, relax, but i just feel like with everything else having evolved SO much -- the tv, the phone, the computer, clothes -- you'd think after all this time, the toilet would be a lot cooler. yeah, indoor plumbing was a great call. but that was decades ago. we're ready for something better. you're challenged again, huh? fax me the blueprints. (side note - are either fax machines or blueprints still used?)

3) How come not everyone can dance? We all have the same body parts (easy...) and hear the same music. so, how come only some people can find a beat and bust a move?

4) Lastly, where the hell does heidi montag get off making a song?!